funny husband wife jokes



After massive demands from all husbands……….
A new app called
“Darr”
is launched for iPhone and Android
You just say..
‘Wife’..
and it closes all websites,
hides all chats,
Shuts down all games,
hide all special folders
and best of all..
puts your wife’s photograph as a wallpaper




If you want to be
Happy with your husband,
Love him Less &
Understand him more !
If you want to be
Happy with your wife,
Love her More &
NEVER try to Understand her !”




Funny husband wife joke in hindi on divorce 


पत्नी: सुनो जी, यदि तुम्हारे बाल ऐसे ही गिरते रहे तो मैं तुम्हें तलाक दे दूंगी पति: ओह भगवान, और मैं बेवकूफ इन बालों को बचाने में लगा था. आज ही गंजा होता हूं भागवान.
:


Clean funny hindi husband wife jokes 

पति प्रवचन सुनकर आया और पत्‍‌नी को गोद में उठा लिया । पत्‍‌नी - क्या गुरुजी ने रोमांस करने के लिए कहा है ? पति- नहीं, उन्होंने कहा है कि अपना दुख खुद उठाओ!


Funny hindi dehati joke 

एक युवक गाँव में स्थित अपने ससुराल गया। उसने अपने साले को उपहार स्वरूप इत्र की शीशी दी। साले ने इत्र को अपनी हथेली पर उडेला और चाट डाला। उस युवक को बहुत बुरा लगा। उसने यह बात शिकायत के तौर पर अपने ससुर जी से कही ससुर जी ने कहा, ''बड़ा बेवकूफ है। यूँ ही क्यों चाट गया ? घर में रोटी थी। उसमें चुपड़ कर खाता।

Funny sexy husband wife jokes on suhagrat

 सुहागरात के समय दूल्हे ने अपनी पत्नी को बाँहों में लेते हुए कहा, ''आज से तुम मेरी प्रेरणा, मेरी साधना और मेरी आशा हो।''यह सुनकर दुल्हन पल-भर चौंकी और फिर बोली, ''आज से तुम मेरे राहुल, राकेश और अमन हो।'' 

Best hindi funny comedy videos

Funny Hindi comedy video by Rajpal Yadav



genelia flirts rajpal yadav funny comedy video






Funny comedy videos by raju srivastav







Sad shayari in hindi


 Aankho ki Shikayat Hindi sad shayari



Uske liye saari duniya se bagawat ki thi
Yaad aata hai maine bhi mohabbat ki thi
Usko chhod ke haste huye ghar aakar,
Itna roye the ki aankho ne b shikayat ki thi



rota kyun hai pagal dil sad shayari in hindi

Pyar jab milta nahi toh hota hi kyun hain…………
Agar khwab such nahi hote to insaan sota kyu h
Jb yahi pyar aankho ke samne kisi or ka ho jaye
Toh phir yeh pagal dil itnaa rotaa kyun hain…


Pyar karte ho to Izhar kar do Hindi sad love shayari

Pyaar karte ho mujhse to izhaar kar do,
Apni mohabbat ka zikar aaj sare aam kar do
Nahi karte agar pyaar to inkaar kar do,
Ye lo mera masoom dil iske tukde hazar krdo.



sad love shayari khamosh rahne do dil ko

Sirf najdikiyo se mohabbat hua nahi karti,
Fasle jo dilon me ho to fir chahat hua nhi karti
Agar naraz ho khafa ho to shikayat karo hamse
Khamosh rahne se dilo ki duriya mita nhi karti.


sad shayari in hindi images






Sad shayari wallpapers


Sad shayri pictures


best hindi love shayari

Love shayari jindagi nashe me gujar Jayegi


Jaam pe jaam pine se kya fayda
Shaam ko pee subah utar jayegi
Are 2 boond mere pyar ki pee le,
Zindagi sari nashe me gujar jaygi




Shayri in hindi for love


Gile shikwe na dil se laga lena,
Kabhi maan jana to kabhi manaa lena,
Kal ka kya pata hum ho na ho,
Jab mauka mile thoda has lena aur hasaa dena.


love shayri jine ki vajah love(Muhabbat)

Dukh me khusi ki wajah banti h mohabbat,
Dard me yaado ki wajah banti h mohabbat
Jab kuch b acha nai lagta hume duniya me
Tab humare jine ki wajah banti h Mohabbat


Ajanabi mushafir se pyar love shayari in hindi

Koi teer jesa, jigar ke paar hua hain
Jane kyu dil itna, beqaraar hua hain
Kabhi dekha nahi maine tujhe, Fir bhi
Kyu E Ajnabi es kadar tumse pyar hua h

hindi shayari for first love


Zindagi ka pehla pyaar kon bhulata hain,
Ye phli bar hota h jb koi kisi ko khud se badhkar chahta h…

Uski pasand, uski khwahish me khud ko bhul jata h,
Akele mein uska naam likh likh kar mitata h…

Baat karne se phle sochta h, kya kehna h.,
Baat hone ke baad fir kuch kehna reh jata h..

Hota h itna khoobsurat pehla pyar,
Toh jane kyun aksar adhoora reh jaata h…

Romantic hindi love shayari



ab koyi itna khaas ban jaaye,
Uske bare me hi sochna ehsaas ban jaye
To mang lena khuda se use zindagi k liye,
Isse pahle k wo kisi aur ki saans ban jaaye.


Hindi Love shayari for newly married couple




Tere seene se lagkar, teri aarzoo ban jau,
Teri sanso se milkar, teri khushbu bn jau,

Faasle na rahe koi hum dono ke darmiya,
Main, main na rahu, bas tu hi tu ban jau,

Suni raato ki tanhaiyaan jab satayegi tujhe,
Teri un khamoshiyo ki main guftgu bn jau,

Jaise dilbar ki ho tujh ko tamanna jaana,
Rab kare, main waisi hu-ba-hu ban jaun,

Gustakhi dil ki mere bs itni si hai khawaish,
Teri dhadkano ki main hi justuju ban jaun.

Inspiring Story : Believe in Yourself

Real Life story of self confidence and success

“ Study while others are sleeping; work while others are loafing; prepare while others are playing & dream while others are wishing” This is the quote that is on my white board that keeps me inspired while on break from school. My goal is to live up to these words and succeed of my goal of becoming a registered nurse. If someone were to tell me I was going to be taking rigorous math and science classes I would have shrugged them and went on with my day. 

I was always afraid to dream because every time I dreamt of a career or a goal I would become disappointed because I knew I had to pass mathematics. I always wanted the easier and softer way out so i would choose careers that had little or no math. As a child growing up without structure and discipline I never learned good study habits so I've gone through life making mistakes and paying the price for them. I have learned from experience to not take things for granted because I took everything and everyone in my life for granted. I have been homeless, in 8 different rehabs and the choices I made lead me down a dark path full of drugs and negative people for the past 8 years. Only by the grace of God have I learned to appreciate every waking moment. Since I have been sober for 2 ½ years now and my life has completely changed, the day I started to believe in god was the turning point in my life. Since I have been sober I have accomplished many goals and have grown spiritually. After I got sober I learned to face my fears with courage. I took pre-algebra during the summer in 9 weeks as oppose to 19 weeks and I aced that class. I could not believe it. I felt like I was on the top of the mountain, i realized at that point I could accomplish anything that I set my mind too.

What I have learned in the past year of being in school is that school is hard work. College is set up for success with all the available resources and that if I really want to succeed I can. I have maintained a cumulative 4.0 GPA for the past year and my goal is to keep this up. I am so grateful to the teachers who made my success possible and all the staff that worked so hard to help me succeed. By the end of next semester I will be done with Statistics. 
I have run into many challenges at school and I have spent every waking moment working towards my goals. I utilize office hours, I ask questions and I keep an open mind. I ask other students their inputs, what they have done to succeed and what I can personally do different. At the beginning of the semester I set a goal for myself. I don’t want an A grade in the class, I want to be the top student in the class. When I set goals such as these I push myself even harder and it helps me to stay focused and determined. School is not a joke and I have never treated it that way, I am so grateful because I have learned my weakness and strengths by facing new challenges every semester. The students and teachers that I interact with have helped me see a side of me that I never knew existed. I believe in myself today and I know I can accomplish anything. 
I have already started preparing for next semester. I am keeping in touch with my teachers and have started to put up the blank calendars on my wall for the spring 2015 semester. I know I need to do all the prepping I can in advance so I can succeed. I know I need some space to center my thoughts, my schedule, and my eating habits and prepare. School is hard work and I've learned that in order to succeed you must prepare and put in the work, every day. I’ve learned from experience to not take things for granted because I took everything and everyone in my life for granted. 
Every semester I give it my all, I don’t ever want to look back at life or my grades and say to myself “I wish I would have done something different”. I push myself and I don’t let anyone or anything get in the way. I go to the tutorial center after class and I stay there until my work is finished. I come home and put at least 5-6 hours in daily every day. I’ve spent a total of 80 hours in math this semester and 82 hours in biology tutorial center, and I come home and study until 10 pm at night. 
I have to work harder than most students because I took a long break and I have had to learn to incorporate study habits and discipline to succeed. College is sacrificing good times with family to study because I know I have a test tomorrow, its coming home right after school and studying more. It’s putting in the work even when I don’t feel like it. But every moment has been worth it, because every time I look at my “A” grade, I smile and say I've earned this and it was hard work. 
I’ve demonstrated leadership and service to the school by taking initiative in helping my peers in my classes as well as in the tutorial by teaching and explaining concepts. I have also scheduled meets up in public places to provide additional help. (I am not getting paid for it as the other tutors in the tutorial center are). I really find joy in helping students that are struggling because I have been in that same predicament and often still find myself struggling every semester but I persevere and I love to share that enthusiasm with others because I know it’s possible to get on the other side.
Submitted by: ravneet k.

story courtsy to: values.com

funny desi jokes

funny desi jokes in hindi

Munna Bhai Ke ghar LADKI hUE.
Circuit- Bhai ab to muhale ke, Sare ladke isko line marenge.
MUNNA- Tu fikar mat kar re, Apun iska naam DIDI rakhenge.


//desi jokes funny, these are  desi joke to enjoy be desi enjoy desi

16 Saal K Ladke Ne 20 Saal Ki Ladki Ko Phool Dia

Ladki Ne Kiss Dia
Wo Ghabra K Bhaga

Ladki Ne Pucha:
Kya Hua

Ladka:
Guldasta Le K Aa Raha Hu

.....................................................................................................................


cool desi jokes to enjoy


UNKNOWN CALL-
HE:"Do u hv a bf?"
SHE:"Yes! Who r u?"
HE:"Tera bhai..Ruk kamini gahr aata hu dhulai krne!"
ANOTHER UNKNOWN CALL-
HE"Do u hv a bf?"
SHE-"Oh no no! Who r u?"
HE-"I m ur bf..Cheat u broke my heart!"
SHE-"Oh darling sorry I thought u r my bro!"
HE-"Tera bhai hi hu kamini....Aaj to bas ghar aane ki der hai!"

.........................................................................................................................


masala desi jokes to enjoy great fun


Ek bus mein ladko aur ladkiyo ki team bani antakshari khelne ke liye.
Girls: Hum tumko harakar dikhayenge..
Boys: Hum haar gaye, chalo ab dikhao.
........................................................................................................

Anath Ashram worker kanjoos se:
Sethji, aap hamare anath ashram ke liye kya kar sakte hain?
Kanjoos: Mein anath ashram mein apne 4 bachhe bhej sakta hu.
................................................................................................

Ek doctor apne dost se,
yar main soch rha hoon ki yahan clinic khol loon
dost: yar tumhara khyal to acha hai magar yahaan ka qabristan chota hai

.............................................................................................


sexy desi jokes



Chemistry Ki class mein teacher ne aik larki se pocha:
What is “Nitrate” ?
Larki sharma k boli:
Sir,
Rs.1500/=
//...................................................................................
Desi Hindi Boy: Mein tumare sath shaadi nahi kar sakta. Ghar wale nahi maan rahe.
Desi Hindi Girl: Tumhare ghar mein kon kon hai.
Desi Hindi Boy: Ek biwi aur 2 bachhe.
...............................................................................................................

Girl after romance,asked her boy friend

Tum itna jaldi kyu thak jate ho,mai to nahi thak ti ???

Boy friend :- Sadak kabhi khatm hoti h kya ??

Hamesha petrol hi khatm hota hai !!!


dirty desi jokes


sardar and teacher desi joke


TEACHER-Why Underwear is Named As Langoti in Hindi?
SARDAR-Because It Takes Care Of 1 Lund & 2 GOTI. So it called "LANGOTI"..
???


NAUGHTY ENGINEERS..!! funny desi masala joke in hindi


Four Girls took lift in a Car full of
Engineers...

Since no place available, they
sat on each Boys'lap...
.
After 5 minuts...
.
Girl1:"Are you an Electronics & Communication Engineer.. ??
.
Boy1:"How do you know.. ??
.
Girl1:"Your Tower is communicating with my Unreachable Area...

Girl2:"Areyou an IT Engineer.. ??

Boy2:"How do you know.. ??
.
Girl2:"Your Pen drive is trying to
connect with my USB port...

Girl3:"Are you a Mechanical Engineer..??
.
.
Boy3:"How do you know.. ??
.
.
Girl3:"UR Piston is trying to move
into my Cylinder..

Girl4:"Are U a Civil Engineer.. ??
.
Boy4:"How do U know.. ??
.
.
Girl4:"UR Dam has Broken and Flooded my village..


भारतीय पुलिस का शेर पकड़ने का तरीका

न्यूटन का तरीका: शेर को तुम्हारे करीब आने दो। जैसे ही वह तुम्हारे करीब आ जाए, उसे पकड़ लो |
आइनस्टाइन का तरीका: शेर का तब तक पीछा करो, जब तक कि वह थक न जाए। जैसे ही वह थक जाए, उसे पकड़ लो |
भारतीय पुलिस का तरीका: बिल्ली को पकड़ो और उसे तब तक पीटते रहो, जब तक कि वह स्वीकार न कर ले कि वही शेर है



Husband : Main ye roz roz ke condom

Husband : Main ye roz roz ke condom 
lagane ki jhanjhat se pareshan ho 
gaya hoon. 
Wife : To phir tum lamination kyun 
nahi karwa lete!

Action jaction wallpapers and posters









Most embarrassing moment for alia Bhatt read interview





What is the most embarrassing moment for celebrity alia bhatt?


Alia bhat asked in a interview about which is the most embarrassing moment for her in life then his answer was he participated in college race without undergarment during race she felt her mistake that was the most embarrassing moment for them.

news courtesy http://www.jagran.com/entertainment/controversy-when-alia-bhatt-forgot-to-wear-her-underwear-11755141. html: 

Funny News :Beggar becamea fashion icon

A homeless person in china became a fashion icon. A model walking on ramp attracts every one but a person from china is point of attraction these days. he changes thrice a day. his cloths or old and torned but his style is amazing.


funny news in hindi

sharabi jokes in hindi


Funny sharabi joke in hindi

शराबियों की दावत! एक शराबी ने दोस्तों की दावत का प्रोग्राम बनाया, और अपने ही घर से रात को बकरा चोरी किया। रात को अपने दोस्तों के साथ खूब दावत का मजा लिया और सुबह जब घर पहुंचा तो बकरा घर में ही था। यह देख उसने बीवी से पूछा, "ये बकरा कहाँ से आया?" बीवी बोली, "बकरे को मारो गोली, ये बताओ रात को तुम चोरों की तरह कुत्ते को कहाँ ले गए थे?"


The joke above was about funny sharabi dinner party joke in hindi in which to drunkers plans for a party at night in drunk state the cooked meat of dog rather than goat funny sharbi party joke.

Durnk sharabi and pujari funny shrabi hindi joke


एक बार एक शराबी, शराब पी कर एक मंदिर के बाहर जाता है और पुजारी से बहस करने लगता है। 
शराबी: इस दुनिया में मैं सबसे बड़ा। 
 पुजारी: भाई साहब आप कैसे बड़े ? 
आपसे बड़ा तो भगवान् है। 
शराबी: भगवान् बड़ा तो मंदिर में क्यों पड़ा ?
 पुजारी: अच्छा मंदिर बड़ा। 
शराबी: मंदिर बड़ा तो धरती पे क्यों पड़ा ? 
 पुजारी: अच्छा धरती बड़ी । शराबी: धरती बड़ी तो शेषनाग क फन पर क्यों पड़ी ? 
पुजारी: अच्छा शेषनाग बड़े । शराबी: शेषनाग बड़े तो शिवजी के गले में क्यों पड़े ? 
पुजारी: अच्छा शिवजी बड़े। शराबी: अच्छा शिवजी बड़े तो पर्वत पर क्यों पड़े?
 पुजारी: अच्छा पर्वत बड़ा । 
शराबी: पर्वत बड़ा तो हनुमान जी के हाथ पर क्यों पड़ा ? 
पुजारी: अच्छा हनुमान जी बड़े | शराबी: हनुमान जी बड़े तो राम जी चरणों में क्यों पड़े ? पुजारी: अच्छा राम जी बड़े ।
 शराबी: राम जी बड़े तो सीता जी के पीछे क्यों पड़े ? 
 पुजारी: अच्छा तो सीता जी बड़ी शराबी: सीता जी बड़ी तो अशोक वाटिका में क्यों पड़ी ? 
पुजारी: अरे भाई आप ही बताइए कौन बड़ा ?
 शराबी: वो सबसे बड़ा जो दो बोतल पी कर भी सीधा खडा।

funny hindi joke sharabi and shopkeeper

 

एक बार एक शराबी रात के 12 बजे शराब की दुकान के मालिक को फ़ोन करता है और कहता है, "तेरी दुकान कब खुलेगी?" दुकानदार: सुबह 9 बजे। शराबी फिर थोड़ी देर बाद दोबारा दुकानदार को फ़ोन करके पूछता है, "तेरी दुकान कब खुलेगी?" दुकानदार: कहा ना सुबह 9 बजे। कुछ देर बाद शराबी फिर से दुकानदार को फ़ोन कर देता है और पूछता है,"भाई साहब आपकी दुकान कब खुलेगी?" दुकानदार: अबे तुझे कितनी बार बताऊँ सुबह 9 बजे खुलेगी इसीलिए सुबह 9 बजे आना और जो भी चाहिए हो ले जाना। शराबी: अबे, मैं तेरी दुकान के अन्दर से ही बोल रहा हूँ। 



Do sharabiyo ki kahani funny joke 

 

 Pehla Sharabi - Zamana gardish mein jhoomta hai,
Nashe nigahon ko aa rahe hain,
Who haath zinda rahein khudaya
Jo mujhko Whisky pila rahe hain

Doosra Sharabi- Janab, kya app hosh mein hain
Agar aisa hai, to aur lijiye
Sharabkhane mein aye hain to
Khudi ko gark-e-sharab kijiye

Pehla - Nasha bahut ho gaya hai sahib
Na aur dijiye sharab mujhko
Ki, ek bara saanp lag raha hai
Ye lamba lamba kabab mujhko

Doosra - Kabab to behtarin milte hain
Sham ko mere ghar kea age
Aur aise khasta ki toot jaayein
Agar na lipte hon unpe dhaage

Pehla - Pata Janab apne ghar ka, is
Khaksaar ko bhi batayiega…

Doosra - Ye mera Card hai sahib
Jaroor tashrif layiega….

Pehla - 18 Number? Nizaam Manzil?
Ye mere ghar ka pata hai Sahab?

Doosra - Mangaa dun Taxi, bahut nasha
Aap ko agar ho gaya hai sahib?

Pehla - Nashe mein koi bhi apne ghar ka
Pata nai bhulta hai Mister..

Doosra - Bahut si pee le to maa-behan tak
Ko bilyakin bhulta hai Mister

Pehla - Mere Mukarram! Yakin kar lo
Behak gaye ho, nashe mein gum ho

Doosra - To goya ‘Farhat’ ke naam par jo
Makan hai, us ke makin tum ho?

Pehla - Kasam khuda ki 18 Number
Nizam Manzil, mera makan hai

Doosra - Kiraya deti hai uska Farhat
Tu keh raha hai tera makan hai

Pehla - Nashe mein kehta hun saaf tujhse
Bahut hai Farhat ko pyar mujhse

Doosra - Zubaan ko de lagam warna
Tu aaj khayega maar mujhse

Pehla - Jo haath mujh par kabhi uthaya
Talak le legi Farhat tujhse

Doosra - Woh tujhko Sandal se peet degi
Ishk karti hai mujhse Farhat

Pehla - Agar tujhi se woh ishk karti
Gale lagati na woh mujhko bhi

Doosra - Abhi jahunnum mein bhejta hoon
Tere nashe ko bhi aur tujhe bhi

Pehla - Galaa mat pakran, hata le apne
Ye haath gande, ye kaale kaale

Doosra - Tabah kar dunga, maar dalunga
Main na chhodunga tujhko saae

Pehla - 18 Number, Nizaam Manzil mein
Bol beta, kabhi ghusega?

Doosra - Tumhari maa ko gale lagaane
Tumhara ye baap abhi ghusega…

Pehla - Kamine Kutte! [fate girabaan]
Zalil paaji! [gayi wo tie]

Doosra - Suaar ke bachche [gilas tute]
Haramzaade! [giri tipaayi]


Teesra Sharabi - Hasin hai mausam, samaa hai rangeen
Laro nai bhai! Baaz aao
Arey o baira! Ye kya garbar hai?
Ye mar na jaayein, inhe chhurao

Baira - Janab, ye dono baap-bete hain
Bhool jaate hain roz pee ke
Ye dono rehte hain ek hi ghar mein
Dhoom machaate hain roz pee ke

Teesra - Magar, Wo Farhat ka kya kissa hai?
Jo ban gayi zebe-dastaan hai..

Baira - Aji, wo hai ek nek aurat
Jo ‘Is’ ki biwi, aur ‘Us’ ki Maan hai…. 

 



Sharabi ka jashn funn hind sms joke 

Wife:
Wo Samney Sharabi Dekh Rahy Ho?

Mein ne Us say 10 Saal Pehley Shadi se Inkar Kia Tha or Wo Aaj Tak Pee Raha Hai.


Husband:
Wah.!
ITNA LAMBA JASHAN!
 

Latest 2014 top 20 funny Santa Banta Jokes

Santa Banta jokes, Sardar ji Jokes, is the most widely shared funny jokes category here is the most funny santa banta and sardar jokes is presennted here.


Ek Bar Ek Angrej India Ghumne Aya,
Ghumte Ghumte Punjab Ke Ek Gaanv Mein Pahuncha

Waha Use Santa Dikha To Usne Santa Se Puchha

Angrej: Kya Tumhare Gaanv Mein Koi Mahaan Aadmi Paida Hua Hai?

Santa Kuch Sochke Bola:
Nahi Ji, Idhar Sab Chote Bachhe Hi Paida Hote Ha


SANTA:maine apni beti ka shaadi sirf 1500rs mein kiya.
BANTA:woh kaise?
SANTA:maine use 1500 ka ek mobile dilaaya. usne love marriage karliy

Master- 2 me se 2 gye to kitne rhe?
Sardar-samjh me nhi aya masterji.
Mster-Beta tumare pas 2 Roti h,tumne 2 roti khali,tumare pas kya bacha?
Sardar-sabji..!


     Santa & Banta Saffar Te Ja Rhe See, Raste Wichoh Raat Ho Gye
Te Oh Tent Lga Ke So Gye,
Raat Nu Banta Di Akh Khuli
Ohne Santa Nu Jaga Ke Kiha Asman Wal Dekh Ke Dass Tainu Ki Nazar Aa
Riha Hai Santa Boliya Bhut Sare Sittare
Banta Is To Ki Patta Lagda Hai
Santa: Assman Bhut Hi Khubsurat Hai Te Roshni B Hai



Santa Underwear khareedne gaya…

Dukandar ne use 300 Rs ki mast underwear dikhayi.

Price sunkar Santa bola:

“Yaar roj pehenne wala dikhao, Party wear nahin chahiye”



Wife: Aap bahut mote ho gaye ho.

Santa Sardar: Tum bhi toh kitni moti ho gayi ho,

Wife: Main toh maa banne wali hoon!

Santa Sardar: To pagal AAurat Main bhi toh baap banne wala hoon


Santa’s e-banking password was:

“ram-sita-laxman-hanuman-ravan-delhi-kejriwal”

Banta: Yaar! Itna lamba password?

Santa: Kya karoon. Bank wale kehte hai ki password main 5 character aur 1 capital hona chahie….

Banta: wo sab thik hai, par Kejri uncle kyun ??

Santa: Ek special character bhi zaroori hai…
Banta: Oye Kanjra, Koi Sada Tent Putt Ke Lai Gya Hai

Happy Birthday wishes

     Happy Birthday sms/ Text messages

If you want to wish birthday to your friend then happy birthday sms or Birthday text messages is one of the best way to wish him.Birthday sms  or text messages are best way to wish your friends birthday because using birthday sms you can wish him either he is living near you or away from you. You can wish birthday via birthday sms, birthday text messages to any person your friend girlfriend, colleagues, relatives, sister ,brother or any member.


Simple Sophisticated quotes to wish birthday to your friend

"Dear, You are not only completing one year on this day, this is the day from when now a new world of happiness prosperity,and opportunity is waiting
just go on  Happy birthday "



Birthday wishes by wishing ambition to be completed

"Fly in the plane of ambition,
and land on the airport of success,
Luck is yours,
wish is mine
may your future
always shine. . .
With LOTZ  of LOVE
"Happy BIRTHDAY 2 YOU"."

Sms wishes in designed sms


.•*¨*•♫♪
░H░A░P░P░Y░
(¯”•.¸*♥♥♥* ¸.•”¯)
░B░I░R░T░H░D░A░Y░ ♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♫♪
Happy Special Bithday To You!!!


Birthday sms wishes:-Roses always stands for you


Roses always stand 4 thoughts
& so these come 2 say,
T hat my wishes r wid U,
today & everyday
Happy Birthday...


Birthday wishes with praise:- Sweetheart! u r so beautiful

Sweetheart! u r so beautiful,
my love 4u will always b true,
here’s a wish 4 my darling…
may all your dreams come true
I wish u a very happy birthday.
with lots of love and kisses…
from a heart that beats… just 4 you.


Happy Boirthday wishes :-My Love

my love.... today you are one year older be happy with it, at the day
like today God created a beatiful Angel like you, and he throws a
biggest party ever....love you  

wish you happy birthday on this grand day


You were crying when u were born while evrybody was laughing there As u live 2 blow a thousand candles, live ur life humbly so that u would b the one laughing when u die and everybody else would be crying. Happy Birthday 


Cool happy birthday wishing text messages

It Must Have Been A Rainy Day
When You Were Born,
But It Wasn’t Really Rain,
The Sky Was Crying Because
It Lost His Most Beautiful Angel.

Happy Birthday Dear Friend


Express love with happy birthday wishing quote

I Can Not Put How I Feel About You Into Words,
But I'll Try. I Love You.
You're My Reason For Living.
Happy Birthday, Lover!
 

birthday wishes, birthdesay quotes, birthday pictur
Happy birthday wishing picture
 I HOPE YOU ENJOY YOUR DAY TODAY AND U SPEND IT WITH THE ONES YOU LOVE!!!! I HOPE YOU GET EVERYTHING YOU ASKED FOR!!!! HAVE A FUN TIME DONT LET ANYONE RUIN IT!!! Happy Birthday

top 20 funny and sexy jokes for facebook and whatsapp



Best funny And sexy Joke you have ever read

Santa running without cloths funny joke

Santa Road par nanga bhag raha tha.
Banta ne usse rok kar poocha: Arre bhai aisa kyun kar rahe ho,
 Kyun nange bhag rahe ho, tumhe sharam nahi aati?

Santa: Kyun ki aaj tum jaldi ghar aagaye, Issi liye.
(oh really santa is smart this time)


funny sexy joke on husband wife divorce case

Judge hearing a Divorce case
Judge to Husband: Why you want to divorce your wife?
Husband: I am not satisfied with her on bed
Judge to wife: what you have to say about this??
Wife: Whole colony is satisfied only this bastard has got problems.


Santa and lady police officer funny adult joke in hindi

Santa par adalat mein ek case chal raha tha...
Judge : Tumne lady police officer ko apna hathiyar kyu pakdaya?

Santa (rote huye) : Judge sahab meri koyi galti nahi hai,
ye mere ko boli kaam karvana hai to pehele mutthi garam karo,
So maine kardi....



Funny Joke :Dukhi Boss

Ek Dukhi Boss ki Kahani:

Kal mera Birthday tha !

Meri BiVi Bachcho ne mujhe wish nhi
kia ?

Mai office gaya kisi ne wish nhi kia,?

Mai apne cabin mei gaya Meri
Secretary ?
 Romantic style mei boli

"Happy Birthday" sweet Boss.

Mujhe bahut achcha lga

Phir usne mujhe apne Flat Pr bulaya
aur kaha ki aaj mai apko boht khush
karne wali hun?

She said:

Mai 2 minutes me Bedroom se aati hun
tb tk aap excitment ki tyari kr le?
Kuch deir baad wo 1 boht bade Cake
ke sath bahar aayi
Us ke peche meri BV ??, Bachche ??, maa ?
baap ? aur pura staff ????tha
.
.
.
Aur mai us Behn Chod
ke intezar me Sofay per Nanga Leta
Condom chada rha tha . .....?????????????
Ab isase funny kya loge?



Funny sexy joke Baap Beta and robot

Ek aadmi apne bete ke liye ek ROBOT laya, jo jooth bolne par THAPAD marta tha.

Beta: Papa aaj mai school nahi jaunga mere pet me dard hai (Sattaak�)

PAPA- Dekha tune jooth bola isliye tujhe saza mili, mai jab tere jitna tha to kabhi jooth nahi bolta tha. (Sattaak�)
.
Wife: (Haste huye boli) Aap hi ka beta hai.(Sattaak�)
.(Sattaak�) .(Sattaak�)



funny joke: suhagrat of newly married couple

Apni Suhagrat Ko Pati Achhe Tarike Se Sex Kar Nahi Paya
Subha Dulhe Ki Maa Ne Bahurani Se Puchha
Saas: “Bahu, Suhagrat Kaisi Rahi?“
Bahu Udasi Se: “Maa Ji Kya Batau, Grah Parvesh To 2 Baar Hua, Par Grah Shanti Nahi Ho Paayi“


Funny Joke:Macchar Dunk marta hai gaan... nhi


Teacher: Machchhar k Katne Se Maleria hota hai Aids kyu Nahi ?
Student: Qki Machchhar Dunk Marta hai Gaand nahi. Aage se Bakchodi Wale Sawal mat Puchhna.


Girl on condom Shop

Girl: condoms Dena..
Shopkeeper(masti main): kis liye -e-e-e
Girl(Gusse se): Tere baap ko gift karungi, taki tere jaisa dusra CHUTIYA paida na kare....


Gall Girl and Old Uncle Funny sexy joke 

Call Girl (to 68 years old man): "Uncle, aap ek baar try karo na!"
Uncle: "Main KAR nahi paaunga."

Call Girl: "Arre, aao na uncle, try to karo!"
Uncle aa gaye aur callgirl pe toot pade aur uski almost faad dali.

Call Girl: Haaye mar gayi. Aap to bol rahe the-
"kar nahi paaunga"
Uncle: "Wo to main PAYMENT ke baare me bol raha tha


Salim Anarkali Funny joke on Seks

Salim: Anarkali,CAN I HAVE SEX WITH U?
Anarkali: Aapne bahut badi cheez maang li jahanpanah.
Salim: Agar woh cheez bahut badi ho chuki ho, toh phir rehne do


Funny Hindi Sexy Joke Mai Kaise paida hua

"पापा मैं कैसे पैदा हुआ"?
पापा - बेटा मैं और तेरी मम्मी पहली बार Yahoo Chat Room में मिले थे। फिर हमने एक Cyber Cafe में पहली मुलाकात थी। तुम्हारी मम्मी के Software देखकर मेरे Hardware को प्यार हो गया। फिर हम एक कमरे में घुस गए क्योंकि हमारा CPU गर्म हो गया था। तुम्हारी मम्मी मेरे Pen Drive से Download करवाने को राज़ी हो गई। लेकिन जैसे ही मैं Upload करने लगा, मुझे अहसास हुआ कि हम लोगों ने न तो Anti-Virus का इस्तेमाल किया है और न ही Firewall का। अब तो इतनी देर हो चुकी थी कि Delete या Escape Button का इस्तेमाल करना भी मुमकिन नहीं था।

छः हफ़्तों बाद तुम्हारी मम्मी ने मुझे Internet पर Chat करके बताया कि उसका Operating System किसी Self-Extracting File के चलते Unauthorized Program Activity दिखा रहा था,

जिससे उसका System Slow हो गया था। वह Self-Extracting File तुम्हारी मम्मी के BIOS में Load थी। नौ महीने बाद एक Pop-Up दिखाई दिया, जिसमें लिखा था, You've Got Mail (Male)!


Funny Hindi Non veg Shayari

Lund pe aitbaar kisko hai…
Mil jaaye chodney ko to inkar kis ko hai…
Kuch mushkilen hai chut paane me dost
Warna muth marne se pyaar kisko hai…

papa and son funny sexy joke

 PAPA : vo kon si cheez hai jis k charoo taraf baal hotay hain
SON : papa may bataoo
PAPA :nahi tum chup rahoo
SON : may batata hoo ….. AANKH
PAPA : ohh haan
SON : to kya aap lun samajh rahay thay

funniest adult and sexy joke you have read in hindi

Ladka ladki ke baap se : Main aapki ladki ka haath mangta hoon.

Ladki ka baap : Kuyn. Ladka : Kyon ki ab mera hath thak gaya hai.


 sexy joke qualities of perfect husband

8 qualities of a Perfect Husband

Brave, Intelligent, Gentle

Polite, Energetic, Nutty, Industrious, Sensitive

And if all else fails, read the CAPITAL LETTERS only!


Girl and Boy Funny Adult joke about marrige date

Girl to boy: Shaadi k liye konsi date rakhien?

Boy: 22 December


Girl: Koi khaas wajah?


Boy: haan, Saal ki sabse lambi raat isi date ko hoti hai..


dentist and woman funny adult sexy jokes

Women to Dentist:

“Its so painful I’ll prefer to get Pregnant than getting my Cavity Filled.”


Dentist:


“Make a Decision, I’ll adjust the Chair Accordingly



funny adult jokes :teacher and pappu

Teacher to Pappu, Isko English main Translate karo:

Sara ne Kapray Pehan liye hain.


Pappu: Shit! I’m Late.

funny adult picture jokes

funny sexy joke santa and dhobi

Dhobi police se: Banta ne meri biwi ki Ijjat lut li!!

Banta: Main press karwane gaya tha,

Dhobi ne kaha main Khana kha raha hoon,

Istri garam hai, Maar lo!

Funny santa banta jokea bout safe sex

Santa: In all  ads, they talk of SAFE SEX.
What is SAFE SEX?
Banta: Oye, SAFE SEX is when wife is out of town! 


Funny sexy picture and image jokes



images for sexy jokes

images for sexy jokes


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Happy janmashtami wishing pictures




Happy janmashtami wishing quotes and sms

 Happy Janmashtami sms

krishan ki mahima, krishan ka payar. krishan mai shardha , krishan se sansar ...mubarak ho apko janmasthami tyohar..LILA DHAR ki kirpa aap par sada barasti rahe ..... Happy Janmashtami

sweet sms to wish happy janmashtami

MAIYA YASHODA KA LAL,GOKUL KA GWAL,JINKE JANM SE HUA GOKUL OR BRIJ KA NIHAL, RAKHE AAPKO SADA KHUSHAHAL....... HAPPY JANMASHTAMI JAI SHREE KRISHNA.

cool sms quote to wish happy janmashtami

Radha ki bhakti, murli ki mithas, makhan ka swaad aur gopiyo ka raas, sab milke banta hai janmastmi ka din khaas...... Happy janmastmi

messages to wish happy janmashtami

Mishri se mithe h krishna k bol, koi kaise lagaye unka mol heere se jyada h krishna anmol Itni taarif ki h pyare ab to "jai sri krishna" Bol

Happy krishna janmashtami sms

krishan ki mahima,krishan ka pyar,krishan me shradha,krishan se sansar,mubarak ho apko janmasthami ka tyohar..SHRI KRISHAN ki kripa aap par sada bani rahe.Happy gokulastami

happy janmashtami sms on makhan chori

Makhan churakr jisne khaya, Bansi bajakr jisne nachaya, Khushi manao uske janm ki, Jisne duniya ko Prem shikhaya. HAPPY JANMASATMi


vrindavan janmashtami wishing sms

Gokul me ji kare niwas Gopiyo sang jo rachye raas, Devki-Yashda jinki maiya, aisehamare kishan kanhaiya jai shree krishna "happy janmastami to all"

shubh janmashtami

Krishna jiska naam, Gokul jiska dhaam, Aise shree Bhagwan ko, Ham sab kare pranam! Jai shree krishna... "Happy Janmastami to all..!"

unke guno se jivan ko sajaye,GITA ke vicharo ko man me basaye,lana he hame KRISHNA ko aur bhi apne karib,to aao apne ghar ko hi gokul banaye.. HAPPY JANMASHTMI--

sms for wishing lord krishna birthday

Wo Mor Mukut,Wo Nad Lala,Wo Murli Manohar,Wo Bansi wala,Wo Makhan chor,Wo Braj Lala,-Janam ashtami ki hardik badhayi..JAI SHRI KRISHNA:

wish you a very happy janmashtami

Chandan ki khusbu,Resham ka haar, Bhado ki shugandh, Barish ki fhuhaar, Dil ki ummide, Apno ka pyar... Mangalmay ho aapko Sri Kirshna Janmashtmi ka tyohar. Happy Janmashtami

here is vast collection of happy janmashtami, janmashtami sms, janmashtami wishing quotes, shubh janmashtami, janmashtami mangalmay ho, hindi quotes to wish janmashtami, simple janmashtami wishing quotes

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