Latest 2014 top 20 funny Santa Banta Jokes

Santa Banta jokes, Sardar ji Jokes, is the most widely shared funny jokes category here is the most funny santa banta and sardar jokes is presennted here.


Ek Bar Ek Angrej India Ghumne Aya,
Ghumte Ghumte Punjab Ke Ek Gaanv Mein Pahuncha

Waha Use Santa Dikha To Usne Santa Se Puchha

Angrej: Kya Tumhare Gaanv Mein Koi Mahaan Aadmi Paida Hua Hai?

Santa Kuch Sochke Bola:
Nahi Ji, Idhar Sab Chote Bachhe Hi Paida Hote Ha


SANTA:maine apni beti ka shaadi sirf 1500rs mein kiya.
BANTA:woh kaise?
SANTA:maine use 1500 ka ek mobile dilaaya. usne love marriage karliy

Master- 2 me se 2 gye to kitne rhe?
Sardar-samjh me nhi aya masterji.
Mster-Beta tumare pas 2 Roti h,tumne 2 roti khali,tumare pas kya bacha?
Sardar-sabji..!


     Santa & Banta Saffar Te Ja Rhe See, Raste Wichoh Raat Ho Gye
Te Oh Tent Lga Ke So Gye,
Raat Nu Banta Di Akh Khuli
Ohne Santa Nu Jaga Ke Kiha Asman Wal Dekh Ke Dass Tainu Ki Nazar Aa
Riha Hai Santa Boliya Bhut Sare Sittare
Banta Is To Ki Patta Lagda Hai
Santa: Assman Bhut Hi Khubsurat Hai Te Roshni B Hai



Santa Underwear khareedne gaya…

Dukandar ne use 300 Rs ki mast underwear dikhayi.

Price sunkar Santa bola:

“Yaar roj pehenne wala dikhao, Party wear nahin chahiye”



Wife: Aap bahut mote ho gaye ho.

Santa Sardar: Tum bhi toh kitni moti ho gayi ho,

Wife: Main toh maa banne wali hoon!

Santa Sardar: To pagal AAurat Main bhi toh baap banne wala hoon


Santa’s e-banking password was:

“ram-sita-laxman-hanuman-ravan-delhi-kejriwal”

Banta: Yaar! Itna lamba password?

Santa: Kya karoon. Bank wale kehte hai ki password main 5 character aur 1 capital hona chahie….

Banta: wo sab thik hai, par Kejri uncle kyun ??

Santa: Ek special character bhi zaroori hai…
Banta: Oye Kanjra, Koi Sada Tent Putt Ke Lai Gya Hai

Happy Birthday wishes

     Happy Birthday sms/ Text messages

If you want to wish birthday to your friend then happy birthday sms or Birthday text messages is one of the best way to wish him.Birthday sms  or text messages are best way to wish your friends birthday because using birthday sms you can wish him either he is living near you or away from you. You can wish birthday via birthday sms, birthday text messages to any person your friend girlfriend, colleagues, relatives, sister ,brother or any member.


Simple Sophisticated quotes to wish birthday to your friend

"Dear, You are not only completing one year on this day, this is the day from when now a new world of happiness prosperity,and opportunity is waiting
just go on  Happy birthday "



Birthday wishes by wishing ambition to be completed

"Fly in the plane of ambition,
and land on the airport of success,
Luck is yours,
wish is mine
may your future
always shine. . .
With LOTZ  of LOVE
"Happy BIRTHDAY 2 YOU"."

Sms wishes in designed sms


.•*¨*•♫♪
░H░A░P░P░Y░
(¯”•.¸*♥♥♥* ¸.•”¯)
░B░I░R░T░H░D░A░Y░ ♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♫♪
Happy Special Bithday To You!!!


Birthday sms wishes:-Roses always stands for you


Roses always stand 4 thoughts
& so these come 2 say,
T hat my wishes r wid U,
today & everyday
Happy Birthday...


Birthday wishes with praise:- Sweetheart! u r so beautiful

Sweetheart! u r so beautiful,
my love 4u will always b true,
here’s a wish 4 my darling…
may all your dreams come true
I wish u a very happy birthday.
with lots of love and kisses…
from a heart that beats… just 4 you.


Happy Boirthday wishes :-My Love

my love.... today you are one year older be happy with it, at the day
like today God created a beatiful Angel like you, and he throws a
biggest party ever....love you  

wish you happy birthday on this grand day


You were crying when u were born while evrybody was laughing there As u live 2 blow a thousand candles, live ur life humbly so that u would b the one laughing when u die and everybody else would be crying. Happy Birthday 


Cool happy birthday wishing text messages

It Must Have Been A Rainy Day
When You Were Born,
But It Wasn’t Really Rain,
The Sky Was Crying Because
It Lost His Most Beautiful Angel.

Happy Birthday Dear Friend


Express love with happy birthday wishing quote

I Can Not Put How I Feel About You Into Words,
But I'll Try. I Love You.
You're My Reason For Living.
Happy Birthday, Lover!
 

birthday wishes, birthdesay quotes, birthday pictur
Happy birthday wishing picture
 I HOPE YOU ENJOY YOUR DAY TODAY AND U SPEND IT WITH THE ONES YOU LOVE!!!! I HOPE YOU GET EVERYTHING YOU ASKED FOR!!!! HAVE A FUN TIME DONT LET ANYONE RUIN IT!!! Happy Birthday

top 20 funny and sexy jokes for facebook and whatsapp



Best funny And sexy Joke you have ever read

Santa running without cloths funny joke

Santa Road par nanga bhag raha tha.
Banta ne usse rok kar poocha: Arre bhai aisa kyun kar rahe ho,
 Kyun nange bhag rahe ho, tumhe sharam nahi aati?

Santa: Kyun ki aaj tum jaldi ghar aagaye, Issi liye.
(oh really santa is smart this time)


funny sexy joke on husband wife divorce case

Judge hearing a Divorce case
Judge to Husband: Why you want to divorce your wife?
Husband: I am not satisfied with her on bed
Judge to wife: what you have to say about this??
Wife: Whole colony is satisfied only this bastard has got problems.


Santa and lady police officer funny adult joke in hindi

Santa par adalat mein ek case chal raha tha...
Judge : Tumne lady police officer ko apna hathiyar kyu pakdaya?

Santa (rote huye) : Judge sahab meri koyi galti nahi hai,
ye mere ko boli kaam karvana hai to pehele mutthi garam karo,
So maine kardi....



Funny Joke :Dukhi Boss

Ek Dukhi Boss ki Kahani:

Kal mera Birthday tha !

Meri BiVi Bachcho ne mujhe wish nhi
kia ?

Mai office gaya kisi ne wish nhi kia,?

Mai apne cabin mei gaya Meri
Secretary ?
 Romantic style mei boli

"Happy Birthday" sweet Boss.

Mujhe bahut achcha lga

Phir usne mujhe apne Flat Pr bulaya
aur kaha ki aaj mai apko boht khush
karne wali hun?

She said:

Mai 2 minutes me Bedroom se aati hun
tb tk aap excitment ki tyari kr le?
Kuch deir baad wo 1 boht bade Cake
ke sath bahar aayi
Us ke peche meri BV ??, Bachche ??, maa ?
baap ? aur pura staff ????tha
.
.
.
Aur mai us Behn Chod
ke intezar me Sofay per Nanga Leta
Condom chada rha tha . .....?????????????
Ab isase funny kya loge?



Funny sexy joke Baap Beta and robot

Ek aadmi apne bete ke liye ek ROBOT laya, jo jooth bolne par THAPAD marta tha.

Beta: Papa aaj mai school nahi jaunga mere pet me dard hai (Sattaak�)

PAPA- Dekha tune jooth bola isliye tujhe saza mili, mai jab tere jitna tha to kabhi jooth nahi bolta tha. (Sattaak�)
.
Wife: (Haste huye boli) Aap hi ka beta hai.(Sattaak�)
.(Sattaak�) .(Sattaak�)



funny joke: suhagrat of newly married couple

Apni Suhagrat Ko Pati Achhe Tarike Se Sex Kar Nahi Paya
Subha Dulhe Ki Maa Ne Bahurani Se Puchha
Saas: “Bahu, Suhagrat Kaisi Rahi?“
Bahu Udasi Se: “Maa Ji Kya Batau, Grah Parvesh To 2 Baar Hua, Par Grah Shanti Nahi Ho Paayi“


Funny Joke:Macchar Dunk marta hai gaan... nhi


Teacher: Machchhar k Katne Se Maleria hota hai Aids kyu Nahi ?
Student: Qki Machchhar Dunk Marta hai Gaand nahi. Aage se Bakchodi Wale Sawal mat Puchhna.


Girl on condom Shop

Girl: condoms Dena..
Shopkeeper(masti main): kis liye -e-e-e
Girl(Gusse se): Tere baap ko gift karungi, taki tere jaisa dusra CHUTIYA paida na kare....


Gall Girl and Old Uncle Funny sexy joke 

Call Girl (to 68 years old man): "Uncle, aap ek baar try karo na!"
Uncle: "Main KAR nahi paaunga."

Call Girl: "Arre, aao na uncle, try to karo!"
Uncle aa gaye aur callgirl pe toot pade aur uski almost faad dali.

Call Girl: Haaye mar gayi. Aap to bol rahe the-
"kar nahi paaunga"
Uncle: "Wo to main PAYMENT ke baare me bol raha tha


Salim Anarkali Funny joke on Seks

Salim: Anarkali,CAN I HAVE SEX WITH U?
Anarkali: Aapne bahut badi cheez maang li jahanpanah.
Salim: Agar woh cheez bahut badi ho chuki ho, toh phir rehne do


Funny Hindi Sexy Joke Mai Kaise paida hua

"पापा मैं कैसे पैदा हुआ"?
पापा - बेटा मैं और तेरी मम्मी पहली बार Yahoo Chat Room में मिले थे। फिर हमने एक Cyber Cafe में पहली मुलाकात थी। तुम्हारी मम्मी के Software देखकर मेरे Hardware को प्यार हो गया। फिर हम एक कमरे में घुस गए क्योंकि हमारा CPU गर्म हो गया था। तुम्हारी मम्मी मेरे Pen Drive से Download करवाने को राज़ी हो गई। लेकिन जैसे ही मैं Upload करने लगा, मुझे अहसास हुआ कि हम लोगों ने न तो Anti-Virus का इस्तेमाल किया है और न ही Firewall का। अब तो इतनी देर हो चुकी थी कि Delete या Escape Button का इस्तेमाल करना भी मुमकिन नहीं था।

छः हफ़्तों बाद तुम्हारी मम्मी ने मुझे Internet पर Chat करके बताया कि उसका Operating System किसी Self-Extracting File के चलते Unauthorized Program Activity दिखा रहा था,

जिससे उसका System Slow हो गया था। वह Self-Extracting File तुम्हारी मम्मी के BIOS में Load थी। नौ महीने बाद एक Pop-Up दिखाई दिया, जिसमें लिखा था, You've Got Mail (Male)!


Funny Hindi Non veg Shayari

Lund pe aitbaar kisko hai…
Mil jaaye chodney ko to inkar kis ko hai…
Kuch mushkilen hai chut paane me dost
Warna muth marne se pyaar kisko hai…

papa and son funny sexy joke

 PAPA : vo kon si cheez hai jis k charoo taraf baal hotay hain
SON : papa may bataoo
PAPA :nahi tum chup rahoo
SON : may batata hoo ….. AANKH
PAPA : ohh haan
SON : to kya aap lun samajh rahay thay

funniest adult and sexy joke you have read in hindi

Ladka ladki ke baap se : Main aapki ladki ka haath mangta hoon.

Ladki ka baap : Kuyn. Ladka : Kyon ki ab mera hath thak gaya hai.


 sexy joke qualities of perfect husband

8 qualities of a Perfect Husband

Brave, Intelligent, Gentle

Polite, Energetic, Nutty, Industrious, Sensitive

And if all else fails, read the CAPITAL LETTERS only!


Girl and Boy Funny Adult joke about marrige date

Girl to boy: Shaadi k liye konsi date rakhien?

Boy: 22 December


Girl: Koi khaas wajah?


Boy: haan, Saal ki sabse lambi raat isi date ko hoti hai..


dentist and woman funny adult sexy jokes

Women to Dentist:

“Its so painful I’ll prefer to get Pregnant than getting my Cavity Filled.”


Dentist:


“Make a Decision, I’ll adjust the Chair Accordingly



funny adult jokes :teacher and pappu

Teacher to Pappu, Isko English main Translate karo:

Sara ne Kapray Pehan liye hain.


Pappu: Shit! I’m Late.

funny adult picture jokes

funny sexy joke santa and dhobi

Dhobi police se: Banta ne meri biwi ki Ijjat lut li!!

Banta: Main press karwane gaya tha,

Dhobi ne kaha main Khana kha raha hoon,

Istri garam hai, Maar lo!

Funny santa banta jokea bout safe sex

Santa: In all  ads, they talk of SAFE SEX.
What is SAFE SEX?
Banta: Oye, SAFE SEX is when wife is out of town! 


Funny sexy picture and image jokes



images for sexy jokes

images for sexy jokes


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Happy janmashtami wishing pictures




Happy janmashtami wishing quotes and sms

 Happy Janmashtami sms

krishan ki mahima, krishan ka payar. krishan mai shardha , krishan se sansar ...mubarak ho apko janmasthami tyohar..LILA DHAR ki kirpa aap par sada barasti rahe ..... Happy Janmashtami

sweet sms to wish happy janmashtami

MAIYA YASHODA KA LAL,GOKUL KA GWAL,JINKE JANM SE HUA GOKUL OR BRIJ KA NIHAL, RAKHE AAPKO SADA KHUSHAHAL....... HAPPY JANMASHTAMI JAI SHREE KRISHNA.

cool sms quote to wish happy janmashtami

Radha ki bhakti, murli ki mithas, makhan ka swaad aur gopiyo ka raas, sab milke banta hai janmastmi ka din khaas...... Happy janmastmi

messages to wish happy janmashtami

Mishri se mithe h krishna k bol, koi kaise lagaye unka mol heere se jyada h krishna anmol Itni taarif ki h pyare ab to "jai sri krishna" Bol

Happy krishna janmashtami sms

krishan ki mahima,krishan ka pyar,krishan me shradha,krishan se sansar,mubarak ho apko janmasthami ka tyohar..SHRI KRISHAN ki kripa aap par sada bani rahe.Happy gokulastami

happy janmashtami sms on makhan chori

Makhan churakr jisne khaya, Bansi bajakr jisne nachaya, Khushi manao uske janm ki, Jisne duniya ko Prem shikhaya. HAPPY JANMASATMi


vrindavan janmashtami wishing sms

Gokul me ji kare niwas Gopiyo sang jo rachye raas, Devki-Yashda jinki maiya, aisehamare kishan kanhaiya jai shree krishna "happy janmastami to all"

shubh janmashtami

Krishna jiska naam, Gokul jiska dhaam, Aise shree Bhagwan ko, Ham sab kare pranam! Jai shree krishna... "Happy Janmastami to all..!"

unke guno se jivan ko sajaye,GITA ke vicharo ko man me basaye,lana he hame KRISHNA ko aur bhi apne karib,to aao apne ghar ko hi gokul banaye.. HAPPY JANMASHTMI--

sms for wishing lord krishna birthday

Wo Mor Mukut,Wo Nad Lala,Wo Murli Manohar,Wo Bansi wala,Wo Makhan chor,Wo Braj Lala,-Janam ashtami ki hardik badhayi..JAI SHRI KRISHNA:

wish you a very happy janmashtami

Chandan ki khusbu,Resham ka haar, Bhado ki shugandh, Barish ki fhuhaar, Dil ki ummide, Apno ka pyar... Mangalmay ho aapko Sri Kirshna Janmashtmi ka tyohar. Happy Janmashtami

here is vast collection of happy janmashtami, janmashtami sms, janmashtami wishing quotes, shubh janmashtami, janmashtami mangalmay ho, hindi quotes to wish janmashtami, simple janmashtami wishing quotes

santa banta and girl boy funny sexy jokes in hindi


Santa proposes to girl funny hindi santa jokes

SANTA:I LOVE You..

😾LADKI ne Jor se THAPPAD Maara, Aur Boli..
Kyaa Kaha Tune.??

SANTA ne Ulta HAATH Ghuma kar Ek MUKKA Maara Aur kaha..
KAMINI..Jab Suna hi Nahin to Maara kyun.??
-------------------------

Funny girl boy joke on over population

Boy-hum 45 bhai behen hain.

Girl-kya..!! tumhare ghar popultion check karne wale nahi aaye the?

BOY-aaye the, hum padh rahe the woh coaching centre samajh kar chale gaye.😀
------------------------------

Funny hindi joke on marrige life

Filmi life aur Asli life me kya ANTAR hai?

Santa: Film me bahut mushkilo k baad shadi hoti hai.
Asli life me shadi ke baad bahut mushkil hoti hai.😀
------------------------------
😀
--------------------------.----

Santa in a hotel funny hindi joke

Santa in Hotel- Mai Yaha Nahi Rahunga,

Mere Paise Wapis Karo !

Itna Chota Room..

Mujhe Jaanwar Samjha Hai kya ?

Waiter-

Mere baap Room Mein Chal

Yeh Lift hai.

funny girl and boy conversation jokes in hindi

Boy: Can U Stop Doing Awww All The Time?
Girl: Awww…. What Happened?
Boy: It Annoys Me.
Girl: Awwww… I Am So Sorry
Boy: It’s Ok, You Are A Sweetheart.
Girl: Awww….. I Know!
Boy: Get Lost Bye.
Girl: Awww…. Baby Gussa Ho Gaya..
Boy: Whatever!
Girl: Awwwww…. U Look So Cute When Angry..
Boy Pulls Out The Gun, Shoots Himself
She: Awwww…. Mar Gaye?

love life funny joke


How is you your love life?
here is fuuny presentation of my love life by picture see it.

Photo: How is your love life ?

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